A couple of weeks ago I had a hellava laugh thanks to E! (My Elegant Chaos). While admiting she has mastered the craft of fallin' up stairs, she reflected back to an experience she had on Capital Hill a couple of years ago. She's always got great entries, but this one quickly became a favorite of mine. Got a minute? Ever fallen in a public place? Go read it...you will not be sorry. I promise. It's that good.
So anyways, I was teasing her about being clutzy and falling and getting older, etc. etc. etc.
When will I ever learn?
Today, while walking down three (count 'em, three) stairs, I did the banana peel thing and BAM! down I went. Fortunately, both my funny bones broke the fall.
Yeah. I'm gonna need a little more sympathy than that!
It was one of those moments when I know I firmly placed my left foot down on the second step. My foot made contact with the solid step and the next thing I knew that same foot was moving in a direction unbeknowst to me. Funny, I didn't tell it to move yet, it just acted on it's own accord. It was like I just stepped in a snare and someone had jerked on the rope to pull my foot out from beneath me. I remember seeing that renegade foot slide down and bounce off the third step just seconds before my other foot decided to join in the fun.
I'm going down and there ain't nothin' I can do about it.
In a feeble attempt to break my fall, I put both my hands down. Wrong! The precise moment my brain sent those instructions to my hands, my butt was nearing touchdown on the second step. The only place for my arms to go was at my side, and just as I jerked both arms down, my elbows and my back smacked the edge of the upper step. And I mean smacked. I sat momentarily stunned before I was able to get to my feet. Both my elbows are humming and vibrating with pain, the right one is starting to bleed and the left has several angry red scrapes on it. That's gonna leave a mark, and some very nasty bruises.
This all happened on my lunch hour which is now over (literally), and I have to go back to work. Long story short, I returned to the office, cleaned and licked my wounds, grabbed a couple of bandaids and returned to my desk.
That was almost twelve hours ago. My left arm is a tad bit sore right now, and I know when I wake up tomorrow morning, I'm going to feel it. My back doesn't hurt, but the smacked spot is very tender. I hope this doesn't come back to haunt me in later years.
On the positive side, there was no one around when it happened, so no one saw me fall. That's always a good thing. No witnesses who will someday feel compelled to remind me that 45+ years after I first learned to walk, I still haven't mastered that craft.